Gender Bender
by S J Smith-Evil Little Dog
Summary: Howard finds a computer program that allows him to see what a person would look like as the opposite sex
1. Boob Tube

**Title:** Boob Tube

**Author:** S J Smith

**Rating:** General

**Disclaimer:** Don't I _wish._

**Summary: **Howard finds a computer program that allows you to see what someone would look like as the opposite sex.

**A.N.**: Written for the prompts, 'distort/gender bender', for Fanfic_Bakeoff at L.J.

X X X

Opening the door to Sheldon and Leonard's apartment, Penny hesitated. Raj, Howard and Leonard were gathered around a laptop, the blue glow lighting their faces as they giggled at the screen. Sheldon stirred something in a bowl on the kitchen island and, from his disapproving glare, Penny knew he hated whatever it was the other three were doing.

She craned her neck, walking past them. Leonard barely noticed her "Hey," waving at her as she made her way into the kitchen. "What's going on?"

Sheldon blinked at her. "You mean with the foolish laughter? Pointing and giggling?"

Penny rolled her eyes, pursuing her mouth. "Yeah. That."

"Well, Wolowitz found a program online that allows a photograph to be distorted in such a way as to render the person of whom the photograph was taken to be altered into the opposite sex."

Of all the things Penny had heard since walking into this apartment for the first time, it really didn't rank that high on the weird-o-meter, still, she glanced over her shoulder at Leonard, Raj and Howard. And she almost understood it. But just for clarification purposes, she asked, "So, you mean they've found a way to perform a sex change operation without going under the knife?"

Another blink. "I suppose you could put it that way."

"Oh." Having had enough of the geek squad for the moment, Penny walked past the still-giggling trio. "Guys, just for the record? If you're sexchanging each other, it begs the question of those things Leonard's mom likes to say about your homoerotic tendencies, and if you're sexchanging me, well, uh, still the same, and if you're sexchanging Indiana Jones for some sick fantasy? I really don't want to know about it."

She heard Howard's, "Indiana Jones! Great!" as she closed the door.

"Boys."

X X X


	2. Gender Bender

**Title:** Gender Bender

**Author:** S J Smith

**Rating:** General

**Disclaimer:** Don't I _wish._

**Summary: **Howard finds a computer program that allows you to see what someone would look like as the opposite sex.

**A.N.**: Written for the prompts, 'distort/gender bender', for Fanfic_Bakeoff at L.J.

X X X

Penny sat on the arm of the chair, watching as Leonard, Howard and Raj giggled at the computer screen. Glancing sideways at Sheldon, she asked, "They're still playing with that sex change program, aren't they?"

"I'd think it would be obvious." He sniffed. "There are so many other things they could be spending their time on."

Something about the look in his eyes tipped her off. "Aww, Sheldon, you didn't make a very pretty girl, did you?"

Sheldon pouted. "I was pretty!"

"Just not asthetically pleasing," Howard shouted over his shoulder.

"It's unnatural," Sheldon said, with another sniff.

Leonard flashed a big grin. "But it's fun."

Raj leaned closer to Howard, whispering in his ear. "Oo, you're right!" He began tapping at the keyboard. "With just a few tweaks of Penny's picture - "

Penny leaped off the chair. "My picture? Where did you get my picture?" She hauled Raj and Leonard out of the way, peering at the screen. "That's not my body, Howard!"

He grinned. "It is your body. Your body of my dreams."

"You distorted it! My boobs are not that big!" Penny howled.

Raj whispered something to Leonard. Leonard nodded. "Yeah, they're not that big now, are they?" His smile faded. "Oh. They're really not boobs."

Howard turned back to the screen. "That's so not right."

Penny pursed her lips, studying the image. "Well. Somehow, that's not exactly surprising." She grinned, patting Leonard's shoulder. "It makes sense to me." Spinning on her heel, she flounced back to the chair and sat down.

"It's not fair," Howard whined.

"Live with it, Howard!" Penny told him.

Leonard pulled a chair from the island and sat on it. "Penny's a very attractive woman. It stands to reason she'd make a handsomer man than any of us."

X X X


End file.
